Online dating in Iceland: Local lads open up

If you find yourself single or have given up on finding the right match with conventional methods your best bet is to meet people through dating apps. But that world is a jungle with so many options to choose from which can drive anyone a bit mad. So we decided to ask a few queer men what they themselves look for in “promising suitors”, how they avoid strange and dangerous situations and what is the best and worst pick-up lines that they’ve gotten. But first of all we asked them to help us find the best dating app out there. 

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Many guys want to see a (non filtered) portrait of the person they’re chatting to, because they don’t talk to other users unless they have one.

Ágúst: “I mostly use dating apps when I’m traveling. In China for example the best ones are Hornet and Scout; Grindr is very popular in Bangkok and in other parts of the world there are other apps that are most used. I recommend you browse through as many apps as you can to find the one perfect for you.”

Jonathan: “They’re all so different and they seem to have different purposes. For example if you’re actually wanting to get to know someone for a possibly long-term thing, I think you’re better off going with Tinder. If it’s just sex you’re after then Grindr is a safer bet. The market is saturated with something for almost everyone… and here in Iceland the same people are on all of them.”

Alexander: “I’ve only used Tinder of the dating apps out there. I’ve also used OkCupid which is a different app but I like that the most, simply because you have more information about someone before you make contact. The thought of being judged based on a few photos and sentences about myself doesn’t sit well with me.”

Gunnar: “I guess it’s Grindr, or The Fence (“Grindverkið” in Icelandic) as me and my friends call it. Everyone is some how on Grindr. Guys tend to have profiles on all these dating apps but when I travel abroad I prefer Hornet since it’s less NSA (“no strings attached”). I can also see more photos of guys on there which helps me decide whether I want to send them messages or not.”

“The most memorable line is: “Are you up for an adventure?” I had no idea what it meant but despite that I decided to reply and that adventure is still ongoing.”

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Be clear about what you want. Maybe just don’t over do it.

Red: “I’m old school so I prefer Gayromeo. It gives you more detailed info regarding people and what they like.”

Georg: “In general I think Grindr is the best one of those apps I have tried but it depends on your type.

Some are looking for teddy bears, some are looking for tweens, while others are looking for ordinary guys.”

Davíð: “I think Tinder is the best dating app of the ones I’ve tried. It’s simple to use and nearly everyone that is single is on it.”

Hjálmar: “It depends on where in the world you are but in Iceland it’s definitely Grindr and Tinder.

There is also a website called Planet Romeo but I don’t know if there’s an app for that.”

Hafþór: “I’ve always been a fan of Planet Romeo. That was the first site I tried and I still use it since it fits me the best.

Users on there are open for everything from one night stands to long-term relationships.”

Best pick up line you’ve received? Did it work?

Ágúst: “I think I need to trademark it, but then again, maybe not. I think it’s best to just talk, be factual and meet. That works best and then it’s easy to get through three dates in a day even.”

Hjálmar: “I think it was when I was in Tenerife and one guy said that he didn’t speak a word of English so he asked me if it was ok he spoke Spanish in bed. From that moment I was his, hahaha.”

Davíð: “Are you up for an adventure with me?” That worked like a charm on me since I’m impulsive and adventurous. He sold me a few dates with that line.”

Georg: “Oh my god. You of course receive loads of pick up lines but I think they’re all so cliché that I don’t even bother memorizing them. I’ve gotten everything from “You’ve fallen from the sky” and blah blah blah to really cheap line which have the sole purpose of getting into your pants.”

Hafþór: “The most memorable line is: “Are you up for an adventure?” I had no idea what it meant but despite that I decided to reply and that adventure is still ongoing.”

Worst pick up line? How did you react?

Jonathan: “Into? Pics? It’s so aggressive and vanilla.”

Gunnar: “I got a really bad one the other day: “Your lips would look good on my penis. Are you on your way?” Then he sent me a picture of his junk. I just blocked the guy.”

Hjálmar: “I guess the worst ones are when older men, which I am not into, send me long messages about how experienced they are and that it’s good for us young guys to learn a thing or two from them. They often mention that they have nice houses and more things like that. I usually just say that unfortunately I’m not interested in sex with old men but that I’m up for a fun chat if they have something interesting to say.”

“A dick pic always ruins the mood if it’s in an opening message with a simple question.”

Alexander: “The worst pick up line that I’ve gotten is: “It would be extremely hot to fuck a guy with a pussy.” I replied quite courteously that I didn’t like being objectified in that way. I told the guy that I would block him for being disgusting.”

Hafþór: “A dick pic always ruins the mood if it’s in an opening message with a simple question. I have a rule to answer everyone even if it’s just: No, thank you.”

What turns you on?

Hjálmar: “When guys are themselves and are not just trying to tell you what they think you want to hear. But some days I’m into Latinos and other days I’m into muscular guys, or really slim guys but I guess straight guys turn me on the most.”

Jonathan: “It’s a person by person basis. I like when people have a sense of humour (actually it’s sort of a requirement). Apart from that, there’s not much else. I like it when a guy has a brain. In the past I’ve been drawn to science types mainly because they tend to question things and not just accept things. You know, they want to see evidence before they share a meme. I like it when a guy isn’t afraid to make things happen. I’m a performer and have a very direct personality and often have to be in charge every day, so if someone really wants to go have dinner and they are persistent, I really like that.”

Gunnar: “A lot of things. I think hands with prominent veins are super hot. And a nice ass is also always hot. Latino guys are my favorite. I think their blood is also warmer than white men and they’re also so sexual in how they move and in everything they do.”

What annoys you the most?

Hafþór: “It really bugs me when I have said no in a polite way and guys continue to try to charm me. Everyone is welcome to contact me but I think it should be unnecessary to block someone to get the message across.”

Guy goes nuts on Grindr when he doesn't get an instant reply.
Sometimes it’s good to be patient – even though you don’t get an instant reply.

Ágúst: “Copy/paste messages and the prostitution that takes place on these apps.”

Jonathan: “Emotional retards. Guys who have feelings about things but are too afraid of confrontation to say something about it. I’ve also noticed a strange trend among some local guys on dating apps here in Iceland.

“I’ve…noticed a strange trend among some local guys … There’s this weird thing where sometimes they insult you or make comments about how they’re really hot, insinuating that you should be so lucky they’re talking to you.”

There’s this weird thing where sometimes they insult you or make comments about how they’re really hot, insinuating that you should be so lucky they’re talking to you. News flash, that’s not hot. It never has been and it never will be. Don’t be that guy. I’ve even told guys that on a date. I pisses me off that much that I can’t be silent about it.”

Georg: “Guys that lie and the ones that demand a photo of you when they can’t even reveal themselves.”

The most embarrassing thing that’s happened to you after you met a guy after a chat?

Jonathan: “There’s way too many to choose from. I’m really bad at remembering names so I guess the most common one is that I spend the entire date trying to remember the guy’s name. I also meet a lot of people because of stand up comedy so sometimes I’ve confidently mentioned details of my date’s week only to be informed that I must be thinking of someone else.”

Ágúst: “I don’t remember anything embarrassing per say but the weirdest thing I’ve experienced was when a guy came to me with his face covered, walked straight to the bed, took of his clothes and had his butt pointing straight up before I even got to say: “Hi there”.”

The more honest you are about what you want the less likely you are to have a misunderstanding.
The more honest you are about what you want the less likely you are to have a misunderstanding.

Hafþór: “The funniest thing was when I had decided to meet a guy and he was going to pick me up at a hotel room I was sharing with my friends. When the guy was just about to arrive I was getting ready in a state of panic and sent my friend to greet him so I had a bit longer to fix myself up. When he opened the door there was an awkward silence since the difference between the photo I had sent my friend and the guy standing opposite him was massive.”

Hjálmar: “Probably when I was logged in to Planet Romeo and wasn’t very active – didn’t even have a photo or info about me. Neither did this guy I started chatting to but he told me how old he was and sent me a photo of his body. When we were gearing up to meet it turned out that this guy was the boyfriend of a girl I know very well. That was embarrassing at first and then it was hysterically funny.”

Georg: “A few months ago I ended up with a guy but a few months later I spoke to another guy and when I went to meet him I ended up in the same apartment. Apparently they were room mates.”

Davíð: “When I had two dates on the same day with very interesting guys. I took my later date to KIKI and there we met my first date. We exchanged some harsh words and I lost my chance with both of them. Not my finest moment but that is definitely on me.”

But what about the most fun thing?

Davíð: “I guess it’s when I meet guys at a café, we click and get together a few times after that. I’ve experienced that a few times and that’s always exciting.”

Jonathan: “In recent history it was a date that turned into an entire weekend of walking, cooking, eating and watching David Attenborough documentaries on Netflix. It probably sounds boring to lots of people, but that’s what I like to do to unwind and it’s the most fun for me.”

Ágúst: “When you’re lucky to find someone you can meet more than once. But you have to shield your heart so you don’t get your heart-broken because all good things must sometime come to an end.”

Do you rather go for tourists or locals or both?

Gunnar: “I rather meet up with tourist than locals. No one’s going to find out about it unless I tell them. I think people talk to much about other people’s private affairs, like who they sleep with and so on.”

Davíð: “It varies but when I look back I’ve met up with more tourist. I guess it’s because I’m adventurous and I’m attracted to exotic people.”

“You know that idiom: “Beggars can’t be choosers.” Well, we have very limited “resources” here in Iceland, so you might as well venture out. I do prefer locals though, because if the chemistry is right then you can at least meet the guy again in the following days or weeks.”
Dating apps are different and seem to have a different purpose. Some are good if you want to get to know someone for a long term relationship, others are better if you’re looking for something else.

Hafþór: “When I lived in Iceland I would rather meet up with tourists. I lived in a small community where the market was pretty stale so tourists were like gold to me. They were new meat on the market but I also enjoyed dates with them more than I did with Icelanders.”

Red: “You know that idiom: “Beggars can’t be choosers.” Well, we have very limited “resources” here in Iceland, so you might as well venture out. I do prefer locals though, because if the chemistry is right then you can at least meet the guy again in the following days or weeks.”

Jonathan: “Honestly if you are taking the time to talk to me I will speak back. However it does actually state in my profile that I’m not a tourist so don’t go waiting till midnight to chat to me – I’ll be asleep.”

Why do you use dating apps? Are they better than meeting people in real life?

Georg: “Everyone knows who I am in the gay scene in Iceland and therefore dating apps have been better for me in regards to meeting new people and getting to know them instead of being judged beforehand. I think using dating apps is a comfortable way of meeting guys who are on the same wave lengths as you without going to cafés or bars.”

Ágúst: “At first it was laziness, then curiosity and then it ended up being my primary way of meeting people who are looking for sex, no strings attached. This in no means substitutes friends or lovers.”

“I use them mainly for fun. I think it’s charming to get to know someone a bit before I meet them…”

Alexander: “I use them mainly for fun. I think it’s charming to get to know someone a bit before I meet them but I wouldn’t say that dating apps are a better or worse way than any other. I can imagine that this is a good way for shy people, for example.”

Jonathan: “If I’m to be completely honest, I use them because from time to time we all have needs and although I’m happy with just me for now, I don’t want to be alone forever.”

Have you witnessed or encountered prejudice or discrimination on dating apps?

Hjálmar: “Not exactly prejudice but it has happened that guys think I must be really weird since I’m a drag queen.”

Make sure you see dating apps for what they are.
Make sure you see dating apps for what they are.

Alexander: “I’ve talked to more than one guy that either didn’t know what it means to be trans or that showed an unusual interest in my genitals. I’ve experienced that my body is objectified and I’ve been harassed for being trans.

I’ve not experienced prejudice towards my sexuality or because I am polyamorous and I’ve only experienced prejudice from male users.”

Davíð: “I am bisexual and I alway let people know about it before I date them. People have mixed reactions to that. Most women are fine with the fact that I’ve also been with guys but many have a hard time seeing me with other guys.”

Red: “Yeah, sort off. But to make it less hurtful I try to see it this way: People have their own preferences. So I respect yours and you respect mine. There is a subtle and polite way of saying that, but some queens don’t know what that means.

So it’s up to people how they will handle that. If you’re sensitive to rejection, then you might as well stick to porn.”

Any good advice for beginners?

Ágúst: “A photograph is necessary because most don’t contact the ones who don’t have a photo of themselves. Don’t filter the image, write a short and good text about yourself which indicates what you’re looking for and don’t lie about your age.

Meet in a public place so it’s guaranteed that your date gets caught on security cameras. Put yourself first and be strong enough to say no if the guy doesn’t want to use protection.”

Red: “Before you start using these apps, prepare yourself by reading articles (and comments) about them. And make sure you have thick skin enough to handle rejection and douche bags!”

Jonathan: “ALWAYS USE CONDOMS AND KNOW YOUR STATUS. HIV is different now but there is still a lot of stigma. Be honest with yourself about why you want a profile. If it’s sex that’s fine, if you want more that’s fine too, but make sure you have built your profile about what you actually want.

For me a pic where you actually look like yourself is important. The more honest you are about what you want the less likely you are to have a misunderstanding.

Be careful of sharing personal details and personal images. We live in a small country but there are still crazy ass weirdo’s everywhere. If you’re not interested you don’t have to talk to someone, but you can also just say so. I think if you’re going to meet up with someone you should always let someone know where and when and update them as well.
Just be honest with yourself and others and make sure you see dating apps for what they are. Something designed for men to connect one way or another. If you get upset by the apps, have a break – but also know that there are other ways to meet men. My last relationship started from a chance conversation on a bridge and that was a 10 year adventure I’m very glad I had.

Just remember – it’s easy to talk to a faceless screen, but sometimes more fun and rewarding to actually introduce your self and say: “Can I get you a drink?”

“Be honest with yourself … If it’s sex that’s fine, if you want more that’s fine too, but make sure you have built your profile about what you actually want.”

Hjálmar: “A photo is a must! I can’t be bothered talking to people when I don’t have a clue who they are. And by photo I mean a portrait.”

Hafþór: “I tell everyone to practice safe sex. Not using a condom heightens the sensitive and can be exciting but if you’re unlucky it’s not worth it. It’s a good rule to always carry a condom on you so it’s near by when the urge calls.

For bottoms it’s good to check if the guy is wearing a condom when he’s inserting his penis. I’ve been warned since some tops never put the condom on or take it off before penetration.”

Georg: “Of course I recommend safe sex even though there’s nothing that’s hundred percent safe. If you live abroad I recommend getting HIV and STD test regularly.”

The guys

Agúst Beaumont, a member of the Pirate Political Party
Alexander Björn Gunnarsson, volunteer for Samtökin ’78 and Trans Ísland
Davíð Halldór Lúðvíksson, developer operator
Georg Erlingsson Merritt, director, writer, editor and a singer, songwriter
Gunnar Hjörtur Baldvinsson
Hafþór Freyr Líndal, youth worker
Hjálmar Forni Poulsen
Jonathan Duffy, stand up comedian
Red Vito Cruz Corcuera, psychiatric nurse

• • • • • • • • •
Ágúst • Alexander Björn • Davíð Halldór • Georg • Gunnar • Hafþór Freyr • Hjálmar Forni • Jonathan • Red

Á. Óskarsson
Á. Óskarsson

Á. Óskarsson offers a variety of products and services to sports centers, swimming pools, schools, kindergartens, and the general public. The company specializes in sport-related products, activity-focused games, and a wide range of solutions for sports facilities.

Á. Óskarsson has been involved in numerous big projects related to building sports facilities and has made it their benchmark to offer good quality products and equipment since the company was founded.

See links to social media in the upper left-hand corner

—————-

Á. Óskarsson selur fjölbreytt vöruúrval fyrir íþróttahús, sundlaugar, skóla og leikskóla og einnig ýmsar vörur til einkaafnota. Fyrirtækið selur vörur til íþróttaiðkunnar og leikja ásamt því að bjóða upp á ýmsar lausnir fyrir íþróttamannvirki.

Á. Óskarsson hefur komið að fjölda stórra verkefna við byggingu íþróttamannvirkja og hefur frá stofnun kappkostað að bjóða vandaðar og endingargóðar vörur.

Tenglar á samfélagsmiðla eru í efra horninu vinstra megin.

Webpage/vefsetur

Blush

    Blush was founded in 2011 when it started selling high quality sex products. The goal from the beginning was to change the market and take the discussion about sex products to a higher level. Today Blush provides professional services in a pleasant environment that fulfills different needs, both for individuals and couples. Blush respects diversity and wants to set a good example in all of its messaging to target audiences. Sexual health and equality in sex is important and Blush wants to focus on those issues through education and open discussion. Blush works in a socially responsible manner for society, their customers and the environment.

    Check out Blush’s website: https://blush.is/

    Omnom Chocolate
    - award-winning chocolate maker

      Omnom Chocolate is an Icelandic craft chocolate company based in Reykjavík. We produce handcrafted chocolate from organic cacao beans sourced ethically and sustainably. We’ve developed direct relationships to create premium chocolate with fine flavor cacao beans.

      Our creative flavors are carefully crafted by meticulous chocolate makers. The cacao beans are roasted, winnowed, ground, and refined into melty-smooth chocolate.

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      In only a few short years, we’ve grown from our 50 sq. m. petrol station space and become an award-winning chocolate maker. Now, with our headquarters in 101 Reykjavík, our chocolate is sent out around Iceland and all over the world.

      At the end of the day, our goal is to make chocolate.

       

      Nasdaq

         

        Nasdaq (Nasdaq: NDAQ) is a global technology company serving the capital markets and other industries. Our diverse offering of data, analytics, software and services enables clients to optimize and execute their business vision with confidence.

        With over 4,300 employees in 39 offices around the world, at Nasdaq we all contribute to the success of the company and its culture, and each one of us has the ability to make a difference. When it comes to our core mission and values, we embrace the role of Diversity, Inclusion and Belonging (DIB) as a fundamental driver of our corporate growth, workplace culture and market development. We strive to create a culture that embraces the power of different perspectives—a culture where people’s unique backgrounds and different experiences helps us fuel innovation and support our clients around the world.

        Our unique position at the center of the capital markets allows us to see firsthand how these values have redefined corporate culture and success, deepening and accelerating our own commitment to champion inclusive growth and prosperity, as we strive to create more equitable opportunities to help people of all backgrounds reach their full potential. Most notably, we published our diversity statistics for the first time in 2020. These metrics serve as a quantitative assessment of where we are today and help determine what strategies we need to adopt to enhance diversity in the workplace. We recognize that we have much work to do, but we are steadfast in our commitment to creating a diverse and inclusive culture—one that reflects the communities in which we live, allows all employees to be their true, authentic selves and fosters individual growth and achievement.

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        Blue Lagoon
        - One of the 25 Wonders of the World

        Named by National Geographic as one of the 25 Wonders of the World, the Blue Lagoon is a shimmering expanse of warmth, relaxation, and rejuvenation. Its unique geothermal seawater
        comes from 2.000 meters within the earth where seawater and freshwater converge in a tectonic realm of porous lava and searing heat. Propelled by extreme pressure, the water ascends to the earth’s surface, emerging enriched with silica, algae, and minerals—the elements that endow Blue Lagoon geothermal seawater with its radiant, healing properties.

        From its humble beginnings in the shadows of a geothermal power plant, Blue Lagoon has evolved into a world of wonder, now encompassing two hotels, three restaurants, three
        geothermal lagoons, a subterranean spa, a renowned line of skin care, a thriving research center, and a wealth of spa and refreshment facilities.

        Achieving harmony with the volcanic landscape, the lagoon and its surrounding architecture embody the unification of the man-made and the natural, and adhere to the highest principles of sustainability.

        The Blue Lagoon. A wonder of the world. A world of wonder.

        Landsbankinn
        - leading financial institution
        Landsbankinn

        Landsbankinn is a leading Icelandic financial institution. It offers a full range of financial services and is the market leader in the Icelandic financial service sector with the largest branch network.

        The present bank was established on 7 October 2008 but the history of its predecessor dates back to 1886. The bank is owned by the National Treasury of Iceland, which holds 98.2% of its share capital, and other shareholders who own 1.8%.

        Landsbankinn’s strategy is to provide comprehensive financial services that meet customer’s needs. It emphasizes providing exemplary service to customers, developing e-banking for their convenience, increasing the efficiency of support functions, modernizing its technology and ensuring effective utilization of its balance sheet.

        The bank’s vision is to be exemplary and its role is to be a trusted financial partner.

        Special emphasis is placed on promoting a performance-oriented culture in the bank. To follow up on the implementation of this strategy, the bank has defined key goals which are measured regularly to determine progress. These goals include, for example, customer satisfaction and loyalty, profitability, cost efficiency and the correlation between risk appetite and employee satisfaction.

        Landsbankinn wishes to lead the development of a sustainable society in Iceland by integrating economic, social and environmental concerns in its operations. The Bank aims to ensure that both its owners and society at large benefit from its activities.

        It intends to achieve this aim by building solid infrastructure and a strong team of 1.100 employees, by listening to its customers and by respecting and encouraging its employees to actively participate in their community. Landsbankinn was a founding member of Festa, a Centre for Corporate Social Responsibility, and is a member of the UN Global Compact.

        Landsbankinn has been a proud sponsor of the Reykjavik Pride since it was first celebrated in Iceland.

        Dohop
        - get inspired
        Dohop

        Dohop allows people to find the cheapest flights available with just one click. Founded in Reykjavik in 2004, it is the only Icelandic company of its kind and quickly became the go-to tool for finding cheap flights among the locals. Dohop finds the best deals among hundreds of different airlines and online travel agencies, to make sure that the user is getting the cheapest price. Dohop also offers hotel and car rental search engines, so users can make all of their travel bookings from a single website.

        Dohop‘s specialty is finding so-called “self-connect” flight options, which can save travelers money by booking a ticket through two or more different airlines. The ability to look for these self-connect option is what sets Dohop apart from its competition, as it can save people hundreds of dollars on certain routes.

        More recently, Dohop has developed a unique product called Dohop Go!, which allows users to check for the cheapest available flights from their home airport. This tool is perfect for those who are looking for travel inspiration but are not willing to overpay for their flight ticket. Dohop Go! is now available in the Dohop Flights App, both for Android and iOS, along with its traditional flight, hotel, and car search engines. “

        VSÓ Ráðgjöf

           

          VSÓ Ráðgjöf er alhliða ráðgjafar- og verkfræðifyrirtæki sem leggur áherslu á trausta og faglega þjónustu sem tryggir viðskiptavinum hagkvæmustu lausnir hverju sinni, skilar raunverulegum árangri og stuðlar að samkeppnisforskoti.  Á skrifstofum VSÓ í Reykjavík og í Noregi starfar yfir 80 manna samhentur hópur verkfræðinga og annarra tæknimenntaðra starfsmanna.

          Macland
          - for all your Apple needs
          Macland

          From starting out as a proper startup with only a good idea and the need to change things, to becoming an established company with 6 employees. Starting from scratch and expanding organically has allowed us to love our expansion and take our customers on the ride with us.

          Macland is located at Laugavegur 23 (101, Downtown Reykjavik)
          For all your Apple needs. We are here.

          Ísey skyr
          - once tasted never forgotten

          Our Story
          Once upon a time, 1,100 years ago in fact, Nordic settlers began arriving in Iceland. They brought with them the skills and knowledge for producing skyr. As time passed, the know-how and recipe for this nutritious food slowly faded out elsewhere in the Nordic region. Luckily, the Icelandic skyr-making tradition continued.

          For centuries, Icelandic skyr formed a cornerstone of the national diet, helping to keep people strong in living conditions that were often harsh. On family farms countrywide, it was the women who nurtured this dairy and passing on both the recipe and the original Icelandic skyr cultures from mother to daughter.

          Ísey skyr builds on this remarkable legacy. It was some of those very same women, the recipients of their mothers’ expertise, who, around 90 years ago, taught Icelandic dairy scientists the art of skyr-making. The production process is more high-tech these days, and the quality standards more rigorous. However, the basic recipe and the use of original cultures to ferment the skimmed milk remain the same. Protein rich, fat-free, creamy and delicious – Ísey skyr is as relevant to consumers now as it was all those centuries ago.
          This is our secret and you are in on it

          You can read more about Ísey skyr on our website.

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