A new documentary film is set to screen at Bíó Paradís tonight, on August 7, as part of this year’s Reykjavík Pride Festival and the content of it is quite unique but also essential viewing in the current climate. The film is called Þrir Pabba (Fatherhood in English) and follows the lives of three men in Norway who are in a multi-partner relationship as they make their journey to becoming Dads.
Kristopher, David and Sindre are all in their early 30s and settling into life in their home in preparation for their ultimate goal of starting a family together. Kristopher is going to be the birth father and throughout the film the three men face many challenges along the way. In particular, Kristopher has to face, head on, the realities and traumas of having had obligatory sterilisation in order to receive legal gender recognition from the Norwegian government; a practice that stopped in 2016, but nonetheless has far reaching ramifications for someone who otherwise would have been able to conceive without the need for intervention.
The film shows a deeply personal insight into issues that many people, including members of the queer community might not even be aware of. Body autonomy, legal frameworks and the sacrifices people are willing to make just to make the dream of becoming a parent a reality, take centre stage in a story told with a degree of authenticity and and human touch that really makes you feel like you have gotten to know these three men who just want what so many other people in the world are allowed to have without question.
The film is set to screen at Bíó Paradís tonight, on August 7 with the proceeds from the screening going towards Trans Island. Before the screening, GayIceland was lucky to have a chat about the film with one of the film’s Co-Producers, Hrafnhildur Gunnarsdóttir to learn more about why this film is a must-see.
GayIceland: Hrafnhildur, this film is set in Norway but there are some Icelandic connections to it, could you tell us about that?
Hrafnhildur: “I was the co-producer of this documentary which was made in Norway and directed and produced by Norwegians. The directors names are August Baugstø Hanssen and Even Benestad and the producer Carsten Aanonsen. The composers of the music used in the film are Icelandic which is our contribution to the project. They are Sindri Már Sigfússon – Sin Fang and Kjartan Hólm from Sigurrós. I also did consulting for the film.”
GayIceland: What first drew you to telling this story? Is there a personal connection to it?
Hrafnhildur: “My personal connection to the issue is that I am one of the people who bear responsibility for bringing the trans issues into the gay movement in Iceland when I was the chairman of Samtökin 78 from 2006-2007. So when I was first approached about co-producing the documentary I felt it was my duty to come on board as I am very supportive of trans people’s rights and I feel film is one of the best ways to reach people.
I have to admit that I was also a little ambivalent about taking it on because we are in such crazy times where trans people are being unjustly attacked every day and a part of me wonders if we all need to crawl into a hole until this shitstorm has passed. Then I asked advice in the trans community and I was encouraged to take this on as it does shed light on these guys’ reality and gives an insight which I think is very important in these times. One is always concerned about the filmmakers being sensitive to the issue however I really like the films of Even Benestad which made me have faith in this project. Even’s first film was titled “Alt om min far” (All about my father) and it tells the story of Even’s father who decided to come out as trans and transition when Even was in his 20´s. It was a beautiful film and I was certain they could make a sensitive documentary about the subject.”
Trans people are being attacked every day and I just really wanted to contribute to making this community visible and show these guys’ dreams and fears, which are not so different from anybody else’s.
GayIceland: Was there a moment, person, or piece of research that made you realise this needed to be a documentary?
Hrafnhildur: “Trans people are being attacked every day and I just really wanted to contribute to making this community visible and show these guys’ dreams and fears, which are not so different from anybody else’s.”
GayIceland: The film addresses Norway’s policy of forced sterilisation for trans people, something many still don’t know existed. How did you decide how to approach such a sensitive subject?
Hrafnhildur: “I only acted as a consultant. However I found it very important to address this issue. I think that the fact that these people who were forced to undergo sterilisation by the government should warrant a class action suit and there should be compensation paid for the damages caused. I believe there has been a case in Sweden where a class-action lawsuit was brought against the government and they have decided to pay compensation to people there who were forced to undergo sterilization, (which is totally unnecessary if you’re undergoing gender confirmation) but the Norwegian government is not taking responsibility. I like the way this is portrayed in the film because it is slowly revealed that Kristopher is actually trying to seek compensation for this unjust rule.
GayIceland: The documentary shows how laws and medical policies affect whether trans people can become parents. Why was it important to include this?
Hrafnhildur: “I find it quite irritating, especially in today’s conversation about trans people where many people, straight and gay, have a position themselves to somehow be against people transitioning, alluding to that people that are somehow toying with sex assignment, without understanding that for someone to get to this stage, they have already gone through so much. It isn’t something anyone would just ‘toy with.’
It’s important for audiences to see the lengths queer people will go, without question, just to get the chance to become a parent.
I think it was incredibly important to shine a light on the fact that in many countries people are forced to undergo sterilization. This fact alone should show anyone just how determined some people have to be, and the things they need to sacrifice to just exist. On top of that, it’s also important for all audiences to see just how much queer people often have to go through; the lengths that they will go without question, just to get the chance to become a parent.”
GayIceland: How did the production balance telling personal stories with explaining the legal and political backdrop?
Hrafnhildur: “I think the film is very strong because it manages to tell a very personal story against the legal and political backdrop. Those issues are all brought out very naturally as the guys are dealing with the various situations. I think it’s the sign of a strong film when you’re not beating people over the head with the issues.”
GayIceland: Were there elements of the story you wish you could have included but couldn’t?
Hrafnhildur: “Well, a film has to stop somewhere, but it would’ve been nice to see a little bit more of the life after the birth of their daughter. I understand that they are trying to have another child now, so life goes on.”
GayIceland: Who do you most want to see this documentary, and what change do you hope it will spark?
“This film, hopefully will be seen by many people and possibly give a little bit of an insight into the world of people who live a different life than the general public. I hope trans people, and people who have decided to live in an unconventional family such as in polyamorous relationships will feel empowered by seeing themselves and the issues that they are facing on screen. I also hope the film will bring communities together.”
As mentioned earlier, all of the proceeds from the screening of Fatherhood – Þrir Pabba will be going to Trans Island. GayIceland also spoke with a board member from Trans Iceland, Jóhann Kristian Jóhannsson.
GayIceland: Can you tell us why you think this film is a must-see for this year’s pride festival?
Jóhann: “Throughout history, parenthood has been out of reach for queer people. There have been, and still are, systematic barriers on every corner, be it a lack of access to reproductive healthcare and IVF, lack of official recognition of a relationship to their children, or forced sterilization as was the case in many countries when it came to trans people.
This is one area where people are often surprised to learn of just how much still needs to be reformed, including in the “so-called” queer paradise of Iceland.
What better way is there to change that than to come to the screening, listen to a panel discussion and support Trans Iceland while you’re at it?”
To find out more about the screening or get tickets, click HERE